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The Chain of Events

Hey, at least my Jaw still works . . .

Second Half Year 2000 and First Half Year 2001


This pic is for the best funniest caption (byline) contest

The "Chain of Events"
A Ghostories Special Monthly Feature

The Buck Started Here

Take out a one dollar bill and look at it. The one dollar bill you're looking at first came off the presses in 1957 in its present design. This so-called paper money is in fact a cotton and linen blend, with red and blue minute silk fibers running through it. It is actually material. We've all washed it without it falling apart. A special blend of ink is used, the contents we will never know. It is overprinted with symbols and then it is starched to make it water resistant and pressed to give it that nice crisp look.

If you look on the front of the bill, you will see the United States Treasury Seal. On the top you will see the scales for the balance, i.e., a balanced budget. In the center you have a carpenter's T-square, a tool used for an even cut. Underneath is the Key to the United States Treasury. That's all pretty easy to figure out, but what is on the back of that dollar bill is something we should all know.

If you turn the bill over, you will see two circles. Both circles, together, comprise the Great Seal of the United States. The First Continental Congress requested that Benjamin Franklin and a group of men come up with a Seal. It took them four years to accomplish this task and another two years to get it approved. If you look at the left hand circle, you will see a Pyramid. Notice the face is lighted and the western side is dark. This country was just beginning. We had not begun to explore the West or decided what we could do for Western Civilization. The Pyramid is uncapped, again signifying that we were not even close to being finished. Inside the capstone you have the all-seeing eye, an ancient symbol for divinity. It was Franklin's belief that one man couldn't do it alone, but a group of men, with the help of God, could do anything.

"IN GOD WE TRUST" is on this currency. The Latin above the pyramid, ANNUIT COEPTIS, means "God has favored our undertaking. "The Latin below the pyramid, NOVUS ORDO SECLORUM, means "a new order has begun." At the base of the pyramid is theRoman Numeral for 1776. If you look at the right-hand circle, and check it carefully, you will learn that it is on every National Cemetery in the United States. It is also on the Parade of Flags Walkway at the Bushnell, Florida National Cemetery and is the centerpiece of most hero's monuments. Slightly modified, it is the seal of the President of the United States and it is always visible when he speaks, yet no one knows what the symbols mean. The Bald Eagle was selected as a symbol for victory for two reasons: first, he is not afraid of a storm; he is strong and he is smart enough to soar above it. Secondly, he wears no material crown. We had just broken from the King of England. Also, notice the shield is unsupported. This country can now stand on its own. At the top of that shield you have a white bar signifying congress, a unifying factor. We were coming together as one nation. In the Eagle's beak you will read, "E PLURIBUS UNUM," meaning "one nation from many people."

Above the Eagle you have thirteen stars representing the thirteen original colonies, and any clouds of misunderstanding rolling away. Again, we were coming together as one. Notice what the Eagle holds in his talons. He holds an olive branch and arrows. This country wants peace, but we will never be afraid to fight to preserve peace. The Eagle always wants to face the olive branch, but in time of war, his gaze turns toward the arrows. They say that the number 13 is an unlucky number. This is almost a worldwide belief. You will usually never see a room numbered 13, or any hotels or motels with a 13th floor. But, think about this: 13 original colonies, 13 stripes on our flag, 13 steps on the Pyramid, 13 letters in the Latin above, 13 letters in "E Pluribus Unum", 13 stars above the Eagle, 13 plumes of feathers on each span of the Eagle's wing, 13 bars on that shield, 13 leaves on the olive branch, 13 fruits, and if you look closely, 13 arrows. And for minorities: the 13th Amendment.

Pass this on. Your children don't know this. Their history teachers don't know this. Too many veterans have given up too much to ever let the meaning fade. Many veterans remember coming home to an America that didn't care. Too many veterans never came home at all. Tell everyone what is on the back of the one dollar bill and what it stands for.



Ah yes, just a Gazebo
(try telling that to Steven King)
Everytime I see one like this I am either reminded of
King's: "The Dead Zone" -- or that great Northern Exposure episode
when Maurice takes a backhoe to theirs, go figure . . .

(it is a fun word to say tho, doncha think?)



Be Sure to Check Out
John Edward
"Crossing Over with John Edward"



A Pilot's Message

The following is from a letter by a professional friend and her return flight to D.C. this week. "I just wanted to drop you all a note and let you know that I arrived safe and sound into Dulles Airport tonight [9/15] at about 6:00. It was an interesting flight. The airport in Denver was almost spooky, it was so empty and quiet. No one was in line for the security check point when I got there so that went fairly quickly, just x-ray of my bags and then a chemical testto be sure nothing explosive was on them. Then I waited 2 1/2 hours to board the plane. What happened after we boarded was interesting and thought I would share it with you. The pilot/captain came on the loudspeaker after the doors were closed.

His speech went like this: First I want to thank you for being brave enough to fly today. The doors are now closed and we have no help from the outside for any problems that might occur inside this plane. As you could tell when you checked in, the government has made some changes to increase security in the airports. They have not, however, made any rules about what happens after those doors close. Until they do that, we have made our own rules and I want to share them with you. Once those doors close, we only have each other. The security has taken care of a threat like guns with all of the increased scanning, etc. Then we have the supposed bomb. If you have a bomb, there is no need to tell me about it, or anyone else on this plane; you are already in control. So, for this flight, there are no bombs that exist on this plane. Now, the threats that are left are things like plastics, wood, knives, and other weapons that can be made or things like that which can be used as weapons. Here is our plan and our rules. If someone or several people stand up and say they are hijacking this plane, I want you all to stand up together. Then take whatever you have available to you and throw it at them. Throw it at their faces and heads so they will have to raise their hands to protect themselves. The very best protection you have against knives are the pillows and blankets. Whoever is close to these people should then try to get a blanket over their head-then they won't be able to see. Once that is done, get them down and keep them there. Do not let them up. I will then land the plane at the closest place and we WILL take care of them. After all, there are usually only a few of them and we are 200+ strong! We will not allow them to take over this plane. I find it interesting that the US Constitution begins with the words "We, the people"-that's who we are, THE people and we will not be defeated. With that, the passengers on the plane all began to applaud, people had tears in their eyes, and we began the trip toward the runway.

The flight attendant then began the safety speech. One of the things she said is that we are all so busy and live our lives at such a fast pace. She asked that everyone turn to their neighbors on either side and introduce themselves, tell each other something about your families and children, show pictures, whatever. She said "for today, we consider you family. We will treat you as such and ask that you do the same with us."

Throughout the flight we learned that for the crew, this was their first flight since Tuesday's tragedies. It was a day that everyone leaned on each other and together everyone was stronger than any one person alone. It was quite an experience. You can imagine the feeling when that plane touched down at Dulles and we heard "welcome to Washington Dulles Airport, where the local time is 5:40". Again, the cabin was filled with applause."

--Addendum: Before you go to bed each night, and every night just for me, sing the words in your head, "God Bless America!" ... , now, don't sing it too loud to wake the neighbors or scare the cat (if you sing like me!), but do it in your head -- start out with a lone voice (yours) and then raise that song to 10 voices (try it), then 50 (that's good, keep going), then 100, and all the way to the voices of thousands of people ... all together, holding hands, believing in freedom (imagine!) ... and I can only believe that you'll have the nicest sleep you've had in a long, long time. ~~ Keno




From the Files:
Things Aren't Always As They Seem
We bring you a True Wisconsin Story:

This story begins late one night where we find a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighborhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys in five vehicles, the man managed to find his car, which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a dry night) flicked the blinkers on and off, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left. At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the road.

The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a Breathalyzer test. To his amazement the Breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the Police station. This Breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the man, "Tonight I'm the Designated Decoy!"



The Incredible Peterson Bottle Organ

As they say in show biz,
"And now for something entirely different!"
As commissioned by Guinness Deutschland for the 2001 Frankfurt Music Messe

Click the Pic to Visit their Web Site

Click the Pic Above to Visit their Web Site

And hear what this creation sounds like!

One thing you definetly have to say in "this life" ... is that if
you think you've seen it all, well, think again!





Highway, Flyway

The Arizona Highway Patrol came upon a pile of smoldering metal embedded into the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The wreckage resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it was a car. The type of car was unidentifiable at the scene.

The lab finally figured out what it was and what had happened. It seems that a guy had somehow gotten hold of a JATO unit (Jet Assisted Take Off - actually as a solid fuel rocket) that is used to give heavy military transport planes and an extra "push" for taking off from short airfields.

He had driven his Chevy Impala out into the desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. Then he attached the JATO unit to his car, jumped in, got up some speed and fired off the JATO!

The facts as best as could be determined are that the operator of the 1967 Impala hit the JATO ignition at a distance of approximately three (3.0) miles from the crash site. This was determined by the prominent scorched and melted asphalt at that location. The JATO, if operating properly, would have reached maximum thrust within 5 seconds, causing the Chevy to reach speeds well in excess of 350 miles per hour and continuing full power for an additional 20-25 seconds.

The driver, soon to be "pilot," most likely would have experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog-fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners, basically causing him to become insignificant for the remainder of the event. However, the automobile remained on the straight highway for about 2.5 miles (15-20) seconds before the driver applied and completely melted the brakes, blowing the tires and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface, then becoming airborne for an additional 1.4 miles and impacting the cliff face at a height of 125 feet leaving a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock.

Most of the driver's remains were not recoverable; however, small fragments of bone, teeth and hair were extracted from the crater and fingernail and bone shards were removed from a piece of debris believed to be a portion of the steering wheel.





(The Pic above is from May 2001 - so the doggie has found a home by now)

Maybe I'm not reading this right, but are they trying to say
if you live in town, you have to pay more?

And, if you don't live in town,
you can pay eleven dollars less?

If that is so, what if you live out of state?
Do you pay, what, twenty dollars less?

Is there a special break for homeless people?

Is the goal to make sure he gets placed in another town?
What did this doggy do?
Was he a mischief maker? A town trouble maker?
A trash can trasher?
Did he chase cars? Hang around bars?
Or stick his nose into someone else's business?
(OH, don't EVEN go there!)

These are questions I wonder about . . .

How about if you are in Canada? Or Malaysia? What about Japan,
or Europe? Is there a bigger break?

I guess if you arrived from another planet, this doggie would be "no charge."
(I can see it now, "Here, take him, he is yours -- go in peace!")
(say that three times in a Mohammed Ali voice)

Oh well, who knows, point is, he is so dang cute, why not call them
today and gain a new "family member."
(talkin' about the dog here, not Mohammed Ali)

And that is all I will say about that -- anyone got a box of chocolates?

Tin of dried fruit?



"Don't Some Things Really Bug You?"

If you lick your envelopes . . . you won't anymore!!!

A woman was working in a post office in California. One day she licked the envelopes and postage stamps instead of using a sponge. That very day the lady cut her tongue on the envelope. A week later, she noticed an abnormal swelling of her tongue.

She went to the doctor and they found nothing wrong. Her tongue was not sore or anything. A couple of days later her tongue started to swell more, and began to get really sore -- so sore, that she could not eat. She went back to the hospital, and demanded something be done.

The doctor, took an x-ray of her tongue, and noticed a lump. He prepared her for minor surgery. When the doctor cut her tongue open, a live roach crawled out. There were roach eggs on the seal of the envelope. The egg was able to hatch inside of her tongue, because of her saliva. It was warm and moist . . . .

This story was reported on CNN.


Some Things Can Never Be Just Plain Old
"Cut and Dried"

At the 1994 annual awards dinner given by the American Association for Forensic Science, AAFS President Don Harper Mills astounded his audience in San Diego with the legal complications of a bizarre death. Here is the story.

"On March 23, l994, the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound of the head. The decedent had jumped from the top of a ten-story building intending to commit suicide (he left a note indicating his despondency). As he fell past the ninth floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast through a window, which killed him instantly. Neither the shooter nor the decedent was aware that a safety net had been erected at the eighth floor level to protect some window washers and that Opus would not have been able to complete his suicide anyway because of this."

"Ordinarily," Dr. Mills continued, "a person who sets out to commi! t suicide ultimately succeeds, even though the mechanism might not be what he intended. That Opus was shot on the way to certain death nine stories below probably would not have changed his mode of death from suicide to homicide. But the fact that his suicidal intent would not have been successful caused the medical examiner to feel that he had homicide on his hands.

"The room on the ninth floor whence the shotgun blast emanated was occupied by an elderly man and his wife. They were arguing and he was threatening her with the shotgun. He was so upset that, when he pulled the trigger, he completely missed his wife and the pellets went through the window striking Opus.

"When one intends to kill subject A but kills subject B in the attempt, one is guilty of the murder of subject B. When confronted with this charge, the old man and his wife were both adamant that neither knew the shotgun was loaded. The old man said it was his long! -standing habit to threaten his wife with the unloaded shotgun. He had no intention to murder her--therefore, the killing of Opus appeared to be an accident. That is, the gun had been accidentally loaded.

"The continuing investigation turned up a witness who saw the old couple's son loading the shotgun approximately six weeks prior to the fatal accident. It transpired that the old lady had cut off her son's financial support and the son, knowing the propensity of his father to use the shotgun threateningly loaded the gun with the expectation that his father would shoot his mother. The case now becomes one of murder on the part of the son for the death of Ronald Opus.

There was another exquisite twist. "Further investigation revealed that the son had become increasingly despondent over the failure of his attempt to engineer his mother's murder. This led him to jump off the ten-story building on March 23d, only to be killed by a ! shotgun blast through a ninth story window. "The medical examiner closed the case as a suicide."




Howdy Doodie

A federal judge has ruled that a Detroit museum is the rightful owner of the original Howdy Doody, the freckle-faced puppet that enchanted young television viewers in the 1950s, after a two-year custody battle with the family of the late puppeteer. U.S. District Judge Christopher Droney ruled there was a clear contractual agreement between Rufus Rose, the puppeteer who died in 1975, and the NBC television network, promising to give Howdy to the Detroit Institute of Arts. Droney's written decision was issued Tuesday, but it was not made public until Thursday. Rose's survivors claimed that the puppeteer, who manipulated Howdy's strings off camera, had only a thought or intention at one point to give the puppet to the museum, but that he never made a "completed gift," and that there was not a sufficient contract or agreement for him to do so.

"The museum is obviously delighted with the results, and felt very strongly all along that Howdy belonged in their collection," said Stuart Rosen, a lawyer for the Detroit Institute of Arts (DIA), which has an extensive puppetry collection. Rose family lawyers could not be reached for comment. The puppet in dispute is what is commonly considered to be the original Howdy Doody, which appeared on "The Howdy Doody Show," the first nationally broadcast U.S. children's television show, which ran for 2,543 episodes between December 1947 and September 1960.

The puppet, sidekick of the late cowboy suit-wearing "Buffalo Bob" Smith, is now locked in a bank vault in Rhode Island, lawyers said. Though a few other Howdy puppets were created over the years, Droney's decision noted that the Howdy in dispute was the one designated "original" by some key figures including Rufus Rose and Smith, who died at age 80 in 1998.

"The clear intent of Rufus Rose and NBC, as expressed in that (1967) contract, was that the puppet be placed in the (Detroit) museum," Droney wrote in his 40-page decision. "The DIA has shown that it is the owner of the Howdy Doody puppet as a matter of law," Droney wrote. The museum said it will not take physical possession of Howdy until it settles some procedural issues.

If you would like to visit a great "Doodyville" site featuring that all around great wooden guy Howdy, click here



Something to Remember that Can Save Your Life
(I thought this guy really used his head -- and kept it too!)

Biker Story Jan 2001






Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned out section of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest fire. The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete with SCUBA tanks on his back, flippers, and facemask. A post-mortem revealed that the person died not from burns, but from massive internal injuries. Dental records provided a positive identification.

Investigators then set about to determine how a fully clad diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire. It was revealed that, on the day of the fire, the person went for a diving trip off the coast some 20 miles away from the forest. The firefighters, seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, called in a fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was dipped from the ocean then flown to the forest fire and emptied. You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like "Flipper" in the Pacific, the next he was doing the breaststroke in a fire dip bucket 300 feet in the air.

Apparently he extinguished exactly 5'-10" of the fire. Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed!







Click Here to See More Chain of Events for Years 2002 - 2003





It's always difficult to bring sad news
But I think you all should know
That there was a great loss
in the entertainment world.
The man that wrote "Hokey Pokey" died.
What's really horrible
Was they had trouble keeping the body in the casket.
They'd put his left foot in . . .
Well, you know the rest . . . .





Three Men and a . . . Ghost?

A Very Special Thanks to Mrs. Carl Murphy who sent this to us:

With all the ghost stories you have on here,
I can prove a true life ghost. It is in the
movie of "Three Men and a Baby!"

There is a little boy in the movie in about two frames and all the actors didn't realize it until they saw the movie themselves. They all swore that there was no one in that room but themselves and the film Crew. The little boy was later discovered to be a little boy who had died in that room awhile ago. Ted Danson said it gave him the chills to realize that he was that close to this boy and didn't know it. I have watched the movie a lot and it still is wild to see this ghost on the screen. I have had my own experience with ghosts since I was five and I love the fact I live in a haunted house today.

--- Sincerely, Mrs. Carl Murphy




Three Men and . . . Cardboard?

What a response to Three Men and a Ghost! The e-mail started coming in and here is the sequel:

From Jon Aishman: Regarding the recent submission about the "ghost" in the movie "Three Men and a Baby", this story has been debunked many times. A member of the crew left a life-sized cardboard promotional cutout of Ted Danson out and forgot to remove it before filming resumed. I've even heard a variation on this story in which the "little boy" was holding a shotgun that he had used to kill himself. Actually, all interior scenes were shot on soundstages, none were shot in actual houses or apartments. Ted Danson didn't get any "chills" either, because he was aware of what the shape was. In fact, no one even noticed the "ghost" until the movie was released on video. Here is one of the pictures (film cell):

Movie Cell

To see other pictures and learn more about Hollywood Movie "Legends," visit Jon's site today at:

And Thanks Jon for sending it in. I also want to thank all the others for their e-mails regarding the movie -- it all made for a very interesting "Chain of Events," doncha think?





Grave Opened
in Search for Real Jesse James!

GRANBURY, Texas (Reuters)

The remains of a man some believe was the Wild West outlaw Jesse James were exhumed on Tuesday for genetic testing to settle claims the infamous robber died in Texas 69 years later than history books say.

The widely accepted view is that James was shot and killed by a member of his own gang on April 3, 1882, in St. Joseph in his home state of Missouri. A grave marker there bears his name. But many people in Granbury, a small town 45 miles (72 km) southwest of Fort Worth, believe James faked his death in Missouri and lived in Texas until 1951 when he would have been 103 years old.

``After he died, several of the local residents here did a visual post-mortem on his body and they found several old bullet holes as well as a rope burn on his neck,'' said Mary Salterille of the Granbury Convention and Visitors Bureau. ``So a lot of the long-time residents here fervently believe he was the real Jesse James,'' she said.

After decades of speculation, the exhumation was sought by Jesse James researcher Bud Hardcastle and three reputed grandsons of the outlaw who live in Arkansas. DNA samples from the bones of the Granbury remains will be compared with those of the James descendants to determine if the body is the outlaw's. The test is being run despite the results of a similar DNA probe in 1995 that determined that James' body lies in the Missouri grave.

Funeral home workers used a backhoe and shovels to remove dirt from a burial plot whose headstone reads ``Jesse Woodson James'' and a death date of August 15, 1951. In smaller letters below it says, ``Supposedly killed in 1882.''

James learned his fighting skills as a guerrilla raider for the Confederate side in the U.S. Civil War. After the Union won in 1865, James and his brother Frank launched a 16-year outlaw career by banding together with eight other men to rob a bank in Liberty, Mo., on February 13, 1866. A botched Minnesota bank robbery in 1876 destroyed the gang, ending with all of the members but Jesse and Frank dead or captured.

The brothers kept on robbing with new partners and in 1882 one of them, Robert Ford, was said to have shot Jesse James in the head in hopes of collecting a $10,000 reward.




Things Aren't Always
Exactly What They Seem

At first glance the caption to this picture looks like it should read, "Man attacked by wild brown bear on shoulder of highway!"

But no, wait! Actually the correct caption would be, "Two men shouldering stuffed bear down the highway to sell at Russian Swap Meet!"

Goes to show ya, things aren't always what they seem . . .
or are they?

PS ... the guy with the cigarette isn't Robin Williams!




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